Who’s This “We” You Keep Talking About?
October 4th, 2011 | 
Author: As my guinea pig group is doing its branding challenge, I’ve noticed when I visit a bunch of sites that too many people are pushing a (hold on, let me straighten up my tie and stand taller) “professional persona” by using the word “we” in their marketing materials.
“We strive to provide the very best innovative and ….” blah blah blah.
Unless you have a team or staff or partner, you’re not “we,” you’re “I.”
I know you’ve been taught to be formal and professional, but unfortunately, it’s time for you to throw all that out the window. Awww right when you learned it, too!
The online sales world is about relationship marketing – you’ve heard that phrase tossed around, haven’t you? Well companies don’t make connections – people do.
You might feel uncomfortable using “I” in your marketing, too. Mainly because we always say to make it all about YOU, the reader. We talk about how the reader is sitting there saying, “What’s in it for me?” And they ARE!
However…today’s online consumer – of tangibles, of information – are becoming more picky. Before it can be about US, we have to know about YOU – the marketer. Raise your hand if you don’t just go to ClickBank and buy anything relevant to your niche! Or a WSO by just anybody. Are you more discriminating?
Do you click on their username to see if they have a website, follow that and look around to see what they’re like? Do you Google their name?
You’re not looking for Write Consultants, Inc. when you decide to learn more about me – you’re looking for Tiffany Dow – the blunt, yet honest marketer whose daughter has earned $1.75 from her Mom’s “bad words ruin the world” jar in less than 72 hours. Right?
You want to know what MY expertise is. What qualifies ME to teach you writing. Does it help you to know what year Write Consultants, Inc. was founded? Um, no. You want to know the fact that I pursued Journalism and when my son got sick, I walked out of a job and started writing for other marketers who often turned out seedy, leading me to inject a heavy dose of ethics into teaching marketing to people.
So look at your website right now.
Are you using WE?
If you’re not Sybil, and you stake claim to the solo entrepreneur title, please embrace the use of the word “I” and see how it helps people connect to you in the relational marketing sense of the word.
Tiff 
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Posted in Career
Well said Tiff!
Hi Tiff
Excellent!
I’ve been a sales manager for most of my career and one of the first lessons I teach my sales team is: ‘Relationship First, Product Second’. This is equally true online where building trust and building realtionships with customers should be the number 1 priority for all marketers.
Tiff,
I like your perspective on this. I had a writing coach review my website and she suggested that I make it more formal and use the third person on my About page. Currently, I talk about myself in the first person on a more personal level.
What are your thoughts on this for a “professional” writing site?
Thanks.
Jenny
Same – use I
Sybil LOL we really liked that didn’t we? Yes we did.
We did too
WE couldn’t agree more!
OK seriously now, sounds a little like the “fake it until you make it” school of thought.
It’s probably not that sinister but it does come off as hyping yourself up if you’re just a one-person shop and you’re always referring to yourself as “we”.
Agree Alan
Great post – very true and the Sybil reference made me laugh.
I totally agree Tiff! Eventually we might be we, but right now it’s just I.
Peggy
LOL Sometimes I have multiple personalities I’ve been told
‘We’ wholeheartedly agree Tiff!
Sorry, couldn’t let that one slip by!
snicker
Lol at the Sybil reference! Great post- “I” really am bad at using “WE” without meaning to. Its a bad habit that needs breaking!
I had to as well Mike
It appears that I am guilty of the “we” syndrome. So I am off to go fix what “we” created.
LOL Good deal
Hi Tiffany,
I have been guilty of us and have been trying to change that. On my optin box, I already changed it on my blog a while ago and then never got around to changing it at my PLR shop. It says our on it LOL. Getting ready to change that now. I did initially feel uncomfortable saying “I” or “My” but I know that I shouldn’t and that’s what I will do from now on.
Yes it’s like there’s a stigma against individuals. LOL!
I meant to write guilty of this.
Hi, Tiff,
I love this. My husband always writes with the royal ‘we’ and I have to edit it for him. It’s better not to use a pronoun at all than a plural one for an individual. “We” comes across a bit obnoxious.
Another great tip!
I agree – kind of snooty.
I must raise my hand on this one, Tiff. I only did that because several people told me that people would have more confidence if I used “we” instead of “I”.
Now you’re making me see this in a new light, though, so I’ll have to reconsider.
Ah no it has the opposite effect on me when I know it’s probably one person and they use we.
I may be one of the few, but if I come across something that I really want to purchase from Clickbank, or I come across a WSO that appears to be legit, I go ahead and purchase the item.
I’ve only been burned once in three years – myself and 50+ others (by the number of complaints on the WSO) before the powers-that-be on the WF finally shut him down. I certainly don’t go out and Google someone’s name before I make a purchase.
Usually the reason I’m purchasing the item in the first place is that I’ve already landed on their website, or I’ve seen that others who I respect have purchased the WSO product. I don’t do much, if any, research on a particular person.
Feeling like I have to know someone and develop a relationship with them before I buy really does not resonate with me.
Needing to see their picture first doesn’t make sense either. Especially when there are people out there who have pictures that have to be at least 10-15 years old or more but now you see a video and they are a whole lot older. Is that honest? And there is more than one person who does that.
It’s a great idea to expand our About pages and let people know who we are as far as building relationships and traffic, or getting to know one another through comments and social media.
I agree that we should make ourselves available to those who wish to know us better, but hiding behind false pictures or creating a story just to induce someone to make a purchase seems false to me.
If we are truly going to become an online presence, we should do it for the right reasons and we should make sure our motives are pure. If not, we are in danger of becoming one of those people who many of us already abhor.
Edie you might be a better judge of character from the get go then. But I still dig. lol. I don’t have to fully know someone before I buy at all, but I am the kind of consumer who does basic research – especially in this niche where scams are prevalent.
False pics aren’t cool – I used that phony avatar and stated it wasn’t me, that I felt too fat etc., and eventually didn’t care and used my own pic.
Just did an audit of my most recent site and found one instance of “we” (old habits die hard) but the rest of the site reflected the solo nature of the site.
those are good stats Derek!
Ouch! $1.75 in the “jar” in 72 hrs., and taking into account she slept a considerable number of those hours……ouch!
Today’s “We vs. I” lesson taken. Thank you.
LOL Yeah it’s gone up
lol
Very good point and I love that you’ve addressed this! I hear this far too often, and have maybe even slipped into it myself sometimes – always feeling awkward when I do! And last night I was listening to a podcast by one of my favorite online marketers and he kept saying it and it was kind of irking me. He does, in fact, have a crew of us who do stuff for him, VA-wise and such, so that might qualify in what you’re saying. It still kind of bugged me, though. And from here on out, I pledge to not do it! My Very Own Mail is me, myself, and I and I shall no longer try to appear ‘otherwise’. Amen.
To me, unless those VAs are getting profit sharing, it’s no We. LOL!
Always a provider of little and large nuggets.
LOL Thanks Geoff
Hi Tiffany
Great blog post. I indeed use “I” on my websites and I recommended other people do too. Also make sure you do the same thing when you’re emailing your subscribers. Always write as though you’re typing out a personal email to someone and not as if you’re writing to a crowd of people.
Cheers
Daniel
Agree Daniel!
Agree wholeheartedly. The royal “we” as I call it, does sound weird used on a site that is obviously run by a lone marketer. Perhaps it makes people feel they are not in it alone.
As far as Sybil is concerned, my husband may disagree with that some days!
LOL Chris mine too
Okay. I am guilty of this.
I’ll have to look at my sites again with this in mind.
good deal!
LOL on “bad words ruin the world” jar….I really did laugh out loud! Still am.
lol She’s excited.
“We” is much more powerful than “I”. I think it’s ok to use “we” even if there is just an “I”. “We” can do so much more than “I”.
So, using both is probably ok. Depends on what the situation is.
Just my two cents worth…
Yeah we disagree
If the goal is to establish a relationship as a leader in your niche, and there’s no real team, I feel it’s dishonest.
Now that’s just funny! I’ve used that royal *WE* since high school. Everyone has always asked who “we” is.
In HS, it became a joke that I had a mouse in my pocket.
People started asking again when I ran my business and I would say it on training calls or during event sessions.
I think it comes from always being a *WE*…from the time my son was born it was always WE because as a single mom, we were ALWAYS together.
Where it came from before that? Maybe from my mom being a single mom too. Had a little brother I was always *stuck* with from age 5 till my son was born.
I’ve never lived alone or BEEN an *I*…LOL
Debi J
LOL Debi! But unless that son is helping you in the business teach, it’s an I
Definitely! With the networking business, yes he was. Could work a room like no 15 year old I knew and people always asked about him more than me!
But in this one…it’s mine…mine…MINE I say (shhhhhhh!). Oh, sorry, had to shut *her* up! LOL
Gotta go check my site to see if I fell back into that habit or not. *I* think *I* use *I* now, *I* don’t know for sure.
Debi J
Since I DO have a partner, WE both go between we, me and I on both our blogs… But I mostly use his name (Stuart) and he mine when referring to US.
Confusing?
Sometimes! BUT each of OUR “About Me” pages are about us, as individuals, not us as we… *phew*
LOL! Deb
LOL And that’s fine Deb
Works as honesty when you do that!
lol WOW it is funny that you made this post because i swear on my website i don’t use the word “we” i mainly focused on the word “I”. At the time i never realized that it was of any importance whatsoever. Who knew.
I think that’s the royal we “we are most pleased with your performance, Lady Dow” lol
Good point!
LOL!
Hi Tiff, Agree with what is said. One thing to add to it – another reason that people use “we” vs. “I” is to appear bigger than you are. In other words, that there is this large company, departments, etc. doing the work vs. just you. I know I was told do do that several years ago in my kid’s curriculum writing business to give the appearance of being more established and legit.
thanks!
True Brad – and I don’t connect with that LOL
I totally agree with everything you just wrote, Tiff. Sometimes I will use we if my daughter is involved in the project but it is usually I.
$1.75 already, huh? She might get rich off of you. LOL
Yeah we’re up to $2.25 Gma! The funniest one was when I said, “D— it!” and then caught myself and said, “Oh h—!” LOL! I double cussed with h— because I was mad for saying D— it. Ah well I’m getting better at noticing AND here’s a cute thing – Scarlett noticed I said “SHOOT” instead of s— so I am learning!
I’ve always thought “we” implied a team too. When I discover that a “we” is really only one person, it doesn’t really instill a sense of trust with me either.
Love the “stake a claim to the solo entrepreneur title” and “please embrace the word “I”!
Same here Kelli
Tiff-$1.75! Yikes! Don’t give my daughter any ideas. She’d be rich by now. Looks like you’re daughter is on her way. Too funny
Um we’re at $2.25 now. LOL!
Guess my Sybil comment got axed. Oh Well. I is always better when you are speaking. It sort of like Politicians saying we will run for office. My mom always used to ask if there was a mouse in my pocket when I used we.
No I have 80 something comments to sort through since I’m behind now. LOL
I must admit I notice this and wonder why people call themselves “we”? When I first started ghostwriting I used to do it, then quickly realized I wasn’t a “we”, I was an “I” – so have been using that ever since.
The thing I especially notice is when people purposely impersonalize their sites by using “we” and never even mentioning any names, pictures or anything about the people behind the site. I understand this is what big businesses do, but for small ones I wish they would say who “they” are!
Exactly Ruth and people DO notice it.
Hi,
I was always taught that the only people entitled to say “we” were royalty and those with tapeworm!
LMAO Bruce that cracked me up!
Hi Tiffany,
Totally agree with you! I was told a while ago to always include the sentence ” I am an individual providing services etc..”. I think it was Yaro Starak who is strong on building your own brand kind of thing!
Just posted my first WSO for ghostwriting to generate enough to buy that DLguard because I just can’t face having to tell my customers, ” hey wait, I am sleeping right now”… Hope to be getting jobs soon!!
Have a great enlightened day!
Yoan
Don’t fret about it though until you can afford it because I did it too. Marketers understand – they’ve been there!
It’s always been about me, myself and I.
I never even thought of a “we”.
For once I did the right thing without even realizing it.
Thanks Tiff
LOL Bravo Brenda!
But me, myself, & I IS a “WE”…just sayin’.
Debi J
We thank you for such an informative post Ms Dow!
hehe!
yeah I did the whole “We” thing routinely coz it felt kinda more official or proper than lil ‘ol me.
Look at most sites and you’ll see “About Us” and rarely a real name either.
We… ooops, I’m just off to check my sites now…
We were all taught that Alex
Hey Tiff,
That we/I thing was something I questioned when I started my website the other day. Little things like that may not be as little as you think. One has to question their motives for doing what they do and remember to treat others the way they want to be treated.
Thanks again!
Agree Shirley and one other person here said it made them feel it wasn’t honest.
A well-known Danish writer always used “we” on his site. Well, maybe he used his wife as a ghost writer, of course, but it sounded phony.
Who’s Sybil? The only Sybil I know is the wife from Fawlty Towers, but it’s not her, is it?
Oooh, my husband tells me that the Danish writer mentioned above meant him and the publishing house… LOL yeah, where would it be without him?
So in some cases, “we” doesn’t just show impersonality, but also inflated ego.
My mother used “we” in a different way. If she’d ordered somebody else to do something, she would afterwards tell that “we” did it. If she actually did take part in the endeavours together with the rest of us, she would say that “I” did it.
Sybil is Sally Field’s character who was schizophrenic.
I’m a single parent, and I often find myself using “we” in my personal life. “We’ll see if we can do that.” I’m not sure why exactly, maybe just a way to share the blame!
Now THAT is perfectly acceptable
I did it too!
I have to admit I’m guilty of that at times, especially when I want a site to sound bigger than one person. However, back in my consulting days “we” used to call it “we-ing all over yourself”. A bit embarrassing when not used properly.
Sharyn